This is the full text from Chapter 17 of Ask and It Is Given, the book by Esther and Jerry Hicks on the teachings of Abraham.
Where Are You, and Where Do You Want to Be?
Have you seen the Global Positioning navigational systems that are available in vehicles today? An antenna on the roof of your vehicle sends a signal to satellites in the sky that identify your current location. Once you enter your desired destination into the keypad, the computer calculates the route between where you are and where you want to go. The monitor informs you of the distance you have to travel and recommends the best route to get there, and once you begin, the system will give you (by spoken word or by text) specific directions to lead you to your new destination.
The navigational system never asks: "Where have you been?" It does not ask: "Why have you been there so long?" Its only mission is to assist you in getting from where you are to where you want to be. Your emotions provide a similar guidance system for you, for their primary function is also to help you travel the distance from where you are to wherever you want to be.
It is extremely important that you know where you are in relationship to where you want to be in order to effectively move closer to where you want to be. An understanding of both where you are and where you want to be is essential if you are to make any deliberate decisions about your journey.
You are surrounded by many influences in your physical environment, and often, others ask or insist that you behave differently in order to positively affect their experience. You are deluged with laws, rules, and expectations that are imposed by others, and almost everyone seems to have an opinion about how you should behave. But it is not possible for you to stay on track between where you are and where you want to be if you are using those kinds of outside influences to guide you.
Often you are pulled this way and that in an attempt to please another, only to discover that no matter how hard you try, you cannot consistently move in any pleasing direction, and so, you not only do not please them, but you also do not please yourself. And because you are being pulled in so many different directions, your path to where you want to be usually gets lost in the process.
Your Greatest Gift to Give Is Your Happiness
The greatest gift that you could ever give to another is your own happiness, for when you are in a state of joy, happiness, or appreciation, you are fully connected to the Stream of pure, positive Source Energy that is truly who you are. And when you are in that state of connection, anything or anyone that you are holding as your object of attention benefits from your attention.
No one else needs you to be or do things for them in order for them to be fulfilled—for all of them have the same access to the Stream of Well-Being that you do. Often, others (who do not understand that they have access to the Stream) suffer in their inability to hold themselves in a place of feeling good, and ask you to behave in a way that they believe will make them feel better. But not only do they hold you in a place of discomfort as they try to make you responsible for their joy, they hold themselves in a place of bondage as well. For they cannot control the way any other behaves, and if that control is necessary for their happiness, then they truly are in trouble.
Your Happiness Does Not Depend on What Others Do
Your happiness does not depend on what others do, but only upon your own vibrational balance. And the happiness of others does not depend on you, but only on their own vibrational balance, for the way anyone feels, in any moment, is only about their own mix of Energies. The way you feel is simply, clearly, and always the indicator of the vibrational balance between your desires and your vibrational offering, which, from your vantage point, you have launched.
There is nothing in all of the Universe more important for anyone to understand than how the vibration they are offering is matching the vibrations of their desires, and the way you feel is your indicator of whether you are allowing your connection to Source or not. Every good feeling; every positive creation; all your abundance, clarity, health, vitality, and Well-Being—and all the things that you consider to be good, are dependent upon the way you are feeling right now and on the relationship that that feeling-vibration has to the vibration of who you really are and what you really desire.
Each Thought Moves You Closer to, or Farther from, San Diego
Just as it is easy for you to contemplate a successful trip from Phoenix to San Diego, it will be easy for you to contemplate a successful trip from financial insecurity to financial security, from sickness to wellness, from confusion to clarity… On your trip from Phoenix to San Diego, there will be no major unknowns, for you understand the distance between the two cities, you know where you are along the way, and you understand what moving in the wrong direction means to your success. Once you understand your own Emotional Guidance System, you will never again be confused about where you are in relationship to where you want to be. Also, you will feel, with each thought that you offer, whether you are moving closer to, or further from, your desired outcome.
If you are using any other influence as your source of guidance, you will get lost and go off track, for no others understand, as you do, the distance between where you are and where you want to be. But even though they cannot understand your desires purely, they will still continually add their desires to the mix. And so, only when you pay attention to the way you feel can you guide yourself steadily toward your own goals.
Why Does Saying No to It Mean Saying Yes to It?
Your vibrational Universe has the Law of Attraction as its basis. That means that your Universe is about inclusion. When you give your attention to something that you desire and you say yes to it, you are including it in your vibration. But when you look at something you do not want and you say no to it, you are including it in your vibration. When you give no attention to it, you do not include it, but you cannot exclude anything that you are giving your attention to, because your attention to it includes it in your vibration, every time, without exception.